I have 2 more traditions I forgot to mention in my earlier post:

From the time of the last trip, we start saving our coins, especially pennies, nickels and dimes, and a couple of days prior to leaving, we go and cash them in and that’s usually enough money to pay for the taxi or limo we use to get to the airport.

The last one, and that’s a really fun one for me, is on the eve of the departure, I pack my suitcase. I’ll put on a concert DVD or a “video’s greatest hits” on DVD of any singer or group and play that while I meticulously start putting all my clothes in the suitcase as per the list of clothes I’ll need. Depending on the length of the trip or the amount of ironing, this can take an hour or two… And, also, depending on how early I have to get going in the morning, I might just brush my teeth right after I’m done packing and go to bed dreaming of the sunshine that’s about to come my way…

Why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why OH WHY OH WHY oh why oh why oh why… oh why can’t people walk in a straight line anymore?

And I’m not even referring to the ones that are sexting or reading as they make their way to work, I’m talking about the other ones who are simply going about their business but can’t seem to be able to continue in just one direction: straight ahead. I’ll understand that all the people don’t have to walk at the same speed, but good lord in heavens above, why do I very often feel that people are “attracted” to the space right in front of me, like some magnetic field I have that collects idiots and sets them right smack in my way. Worst of all, if I try to pass them to the right, they go in that direction or if I try to the left, then that’s where they also need to go.

This often results in me uttering some niceties such as: “fucking moron” or “stupid slut” or “fucking slut that’s also a stupid moron” or “fat something”… Fat something always makes me feel thinner, thus better.

And then I get my coffee and all is good.

Ok, I’ll be the first one to admit that I never went to English school and maybe I shouldn’t have such a strong opinion, English is my second language after all. I am self-taught. I learned English from reading, watching TV, movies, hanging out more and more with English people when I was younger, then moving to an English province and city and finally working and living in English. I make lots of mistakes, but I can carry a conversation or write a story without repeating the same god-damned fucking words over and over again.

This morning, while in a line up for my coffee, I was forced to listen to the self-indulging diatribe of a young woman to her uninterested female friend:

Girl 1: So he was like you shouldn’t have said that, and I was like well I did so he was like why did you feel you had to do this and I was like she needed to know and he was like that’s your opinion I don’t think she needed to know and I was like if he’s cheating on her she should know and he was like maybe he was just seeing what else was out there you have no proof he was cheating on her because you saw him talking to someone else in a bar and I was like HE WAS KISSSSSSSSSSING HERRRRRRR!

Girl 2: (looking at the food on the counter, dazing away, not really listening)

Girl 1: So he was like he probably had too much to drink and I was like well he shouldn’t have kissed her and Tracey needed to know and he was like she wasn’t even there, she knew he was going out with his friends and I was like…

Barista: How can I help you?

Me: Venti Mild and 2 aspirins (with my eyes rolling to point at the airhead behind me)

On my quick walk to the office following this, I couldn’t help but wonder why young people today cannot tell a story anymore without sounding like idiots and repeating the same thing over and over… I understood the gest of it, she wanted to tell this girl the guy had kissed another girl but did we really have to suffer through the “and I was like and he was like and I was like and he was like and I was like and he was like and I…..”? What’s happened to English? Have American movies and tv shows really made the younger generation that way or have they just become lazy “raconteurs”.

Here’s another reason I’m glad I grew up in the 80’s:

Through the years, since my first big trip on an airplane, I have developed some little traditions that I like to keep prior to a nice vacation.

Depending on the trip of course, those traditions vary. Let’s say I was going to Disney World, I would NEED to buy a new pair of running shoes that would be worn for the first time on Disney soil… well, maybe I’d put them on at home prior to taking the plane or something, but for sure, in the course of the first 12 hours of being worn, they would touch sacred Disney ground and then upon returning home, I’d continue to wear them and spread a little bit of the Disney magic onto the Toronto sidewalks as I’d go on my everyday life…

If we’re going on a cruise, I then NEED to buy new dress shoes for all the nice outfits we wear at dinners and stuff. Upon returning home, I continue wearing them at the office and bring some of the fun Caribbean sunshine to work.

For a cruise, I will also buy a new cologne… this time I opted for Puma Create… couldn’t resist that fun bottle. And the scent is ok too…

For any trip, I buy a brand new tooth brush for the travel kit, even if the one that was in there was only used for one week. A tooth brush per trip is my motto.

Also, for every trip, I buy brand new underwear, one pair for every day that I am gone + one extra in case. I do the same thing for socks, dress socks or sport socks, too…

This year, because of the asshole that tried blowing up a plane on Christmas day, I had to go and buy a new “carry on” bag for the flights as the one I have used for the last 15 years is now too “big” as per the airline’s new policies. So off we went on the search for the perfect back to carry our trip documents (airplane tickets, hotel confirmations, limo service confirmation, embarkation document for the cruise, luggage tags for the cruise), a book, a magazine, a camera, an indispensable iPhone, a pen, gum and candies. After looking at all the obvious places like luggage stores, department stores, ladies purses stores, we decided to check an army surplus place that sells all sorts of bags. It turned out to be the perfect place as I found exactly what I was looking for. I bought this great WWII leather document carrier bag that some soldiers would use to, well, carry documents:

New carry-on bag. I wonder what special documents were transported in it…

I couldn’t resist putting my Graceland pen in it, I’ll need this to fill out Customs’ forms.

Our last trip tradition is to buy a little something for GeorgeHamilton, and now BillyDeeWilliams too. This year, they are getting their own Camo-Kitty-Tent… Lucky guys.

Having fun with RuPaul’s Dragulator:

And to scare you even more:

What’s your Dragulator?

In my quest to all things Disney, I’ve been buying and watching a lot of their movies in the last few years, and lately especially, I have been enjoying all the live-action movies that the studio made in the 50’s and 60’s.

I’ve rediscovered Dean Jones while watching That Darn Cat, Blackbeard’s Ghost and The Ugly Dachshund, which led to buying The Horse In The Grey Flannel Suit and The Million Dollar Duck. I guess most recognizable hit with Disney will remain The Love Bug though.

Tonight, just by fluke, I found this little gem of his, recording the score for Company and singing his little heart out on Being Alive… The man is golden.

4:00 am…

Again.

That’s when they come home from whatever fucking dive bar they’ve gotten themselves drunk into, or maybe even work at… I don’t know. I don’t care… I just want the noise to stop… If it’s not one falling to the ground drunk as a skunk, it’s the other fucking his mate for hours. Unless they decided to bring a group of friends over wearing lead boots and a handful of fire-ants in their underwear because it seems like not one of them fuckers can sit still for longer than 3 seconds.

We’ve tried the telephone approach. We’ve tried the face to face approach. We’ve tried the threatening approach by telling them we’ll have no choice but to tell the landlord. Every time we get a reprieve, but then it starts again. One night here… one night there… then two nights in a row…

On Friday night, we decided to watch This Is It, the MJ documentary film of the rehearsals for what was to be his last series of concert. Then the first song came on and didn’t realize how loud our sound system was and we both jumped in our seats… It was 7pm… and as DR reached for the remote control to lower the volume, I stopped him: “No, no! It’s time for the neighbours to get up now”…

I wanted a little bit of a revenge or sorts, but after the first song was over, that was all the really loud noise I could take… we lowered it to an acceptable level for us to continue watching.

Thing is, what do we do now? Do we start again with the telephone approach or the face to face approach? Do we tell the landlord? How freakishly childish would that be… Or do we start decorating the stairway to our apartments with signs that read:

“It’s fucking 4am, shouldn’t you be sleeping too?”
“Lead Boots Allowed during Business Hours Only”
“Techno Dance Is Better With Earphones On at Midnight”
“ SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH‘

Give me ideas, I’m too “unrested” to think right now!

I saw Rent, the live musical version, for the 3rd time last Tuesday, and it was the best production ever. So glad I went again.

11 years ago, Rent was playing in town with a permanent production, if I’m not mistaken the show was here for 2 years, I saw it when it first started with all my staff and I bought tickets for the very last performance when the show closed. I had loved it that much… The first time was amazing, just great, I didn’t really know the story and was blown away by the message, the acting, the singing, the songs, the sets… The second time was good, but something was off that night, maybe because it was the last performance, who knows, but the energy was down on stage even with the electrifying cheers from the audience.

But last Tuesday, I saw it with “the pros”… 2 of the original cast members from the Broadway production are touring across America and they are in town for a few weeks… Adam Pascal as Roger AND Anthony Rapp as Mark… and they owned the show. Their performance was absolutely hypnotizing. These guys have known these characters for almost 20 years and it was obvious they loved them… And to top this off, Gwen Stewart also reprises her role as a homeless lady from the original show. She is the lady with the gorgeous crystal piercing voice on the original Broadway recording, the one from Seasons Of Love. Sigh! What a great evening it was. It also helped that my friend Lisell was able to secure us the most amazing tickets, 7th row / centre.

Anthony Rapp & Adam Pascal
(courtesy of broadwayworld.com)

Gwen Stewart
(courtesy of braodwayworld.com)

I’m glad DR agreed to see it live as the movie version didn’t really hold a candle to the live show. And I know he was as moved as the rest of us during the performance.

Of course, when we are in New York City next month, we will have brunch at the Life Cafe… I might just sing a verse from La Vie Boheme.

DR and I go to St-Lawrence Market on a regular basis, not every week, but it is our place of choice for fresh veggies and meat. Our routine is always the same, we get ready very early, take a few cloth bags with us and walk the 20 minutes it takes us to get there. Our first stop never changes either: Peameal Bacon On A Bun and we sit by the bakery and savour our breakfast. After that we start shopping, meat first, then we cross the street for the veggies directly from the farmers renting space for that day.

This week was no exception, except that while DR was paying for the sandwiches, I went to grab us some napkins out of the restaurant’s dispenser. I thought I was getting 2 or 3, but when I pulled the entire container emptied all over the counter… I took what I needed and walked away, not much I could do about that, I didn’t need 75 napkins after all. But it did take me back in time… a time when 6 friends from high school were on a school organized trip to New York City, my very first time there. I was 17 yrs old. It was 1981.

There we were for 4 days on a very limited budget trying to explore all that the city had to offer… we did everything from the Statue of Liberty to Empire State Building to Rockefeller Centre to 42nd Street at night to the Subway to Central Park to World Trade Centre to the Meat Market. We ran around like crazy without sleeping much while there.

Of course, our meals consisted of the cheapest options we could find: McDonald’s, Burger King, Street Meat, Pizza, etc, our rule was that as long as it was under $5 per person, it was OK, we didn’t care.
One girl that was with us was a little particular, she was actually the friend of a friend and we didn’t know here very well, but she was pleasant and got along with everyone… until the meals. Whatever place we would go to, she would take a huge amount of napkins and would wipe her mouth after every bite and throw the napkin out… a burger would mean approximately 20 napkins would get tossed, and double that if we went to a cheap pasta place… We really shouldn’t have cared, but it bugged all of us that she couldn’t re-use a napkin twice by turning it around. She said they were free with the meal and preferred using a new one everytime…

I swear that it was at one of those meals that a tricky Madison Avenue man watching us coined the expression wildly known around the world nowadays: Reduce, Re-use, Recycle.

Just based on us, little Canadian high school travelers.