Archive for May, 2010


Mouth Breather

In my daily walks around the city, either to and from work, or just when we are exploring around town, I always see and criticize people. Fashion, mannerisms, hair, body types and moods are pretty much what I observe first… And then KABLOUIE I’ll look at their faces and I can’t express just how much I despise mouth breathers #48… I don’t know what it is about it, it’s just not normal (and we all know how normal I am).

They look in such pain and discomfort with their faces scrunching, eyes squinting, dry teeth, upper lips pulled up, like the sun is just shooting fucking laser beams at them…

I’m sure I don’t have the only mom in the world who always told me to close my mouth when I eat, when I breath, when… wait a minute… was she just trying to tell me to shut up????

A Photo Study Of City Hall

Today was Doors Open Toronto and on our way to the famous Canada Life Building on University St, we decided to go check out the new City Hall Podium Green Roof which was having its official opening today and will from now on be opened to the public once again after years and years of being off limit. Personally, I’m quite happy about it as it will be another place in the summer time to go and enjoy reading in the sunshine on my lunch hour.

While we were there, I decided to snap some pictures of our very unusual looking City Hall:

This picture was actually taken last, it was from the observatory deck on the 17th floor of Canada Life building after our visit to City Hall. You can see part of the new garden and open space.

Toronto’s own UFO

Curves to the right

Curves to the left

West Tower and East Tower almost connect

From the back

Back of East Tower in the sun

Back of East Tower from the ground

We also run into these playful Green People:

DR and friends. Adorable!

And now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll go have a nice cold beer on a patio and have some good thoughts for my father, who’s birthday was today.

Thank You For Noticing!

I’ve had a beard on my face for 10 years. And if I didn’t have a full beard during that time, I would sport a goatee or a handlebar type moustache.

Today my boss of 3 years, the one who interviewed me twice for my full-time job and then again for another internal job I went for, the same person who’s office I’ve sat right in front of for 2 full years, that very same one who’s office door I had to close because she was so loud in her conversation, the same one who’s told me in tons of details of her love with the video games Portal and Halo on Xbox 360, the exact same one who discussed the benefits of Plasma TV compared to LCD when we were looking buy one as she has both, the same one who has approved all my many vacation requests, had me sitting in her office when a certain co-worker was being an ass to reassure me they were taking steps have him removed from the area, the same one who has come to me many a time to translate letters or emails she had received in French from customers in Quebec, the one who’s given me 3 different employee reviews…

That very same person who I see pretty much every day at work asked me if my beard was new…

Luckily I had already had half of my Venti Mild and I was alert enough not to throw something at her or give her some stupid retort that would’ve hurt her feelings, I just said: “Thank you for noticing!” And I let her get her key out to open the door for me even though mine was in my hand.

MMMyyyyyy! What A Happy Day!

You can’t help but be in a good mood when you hear a song like this:

teehee.. she said all the world is gay…

Was Victoria Day Invented For Assholes?

We live in an old apartment. In fact, this little triplex just turned 101 years old this year. That means really old dry wood. It’s very charming but also SUPER flammable.

We also live above a hardware store. A hardware store that sells propane gas tanks for BBQs. These are stored in the back of the building in a locked area in the parking lot.

Needless to say, I spend a few minutes each week worrying about the effect a little fire would have on our place.

Last night, I was lying in bed watching old episodes of Hawaii 5-0 and DR was playing Infamous on the PS3 in the living room when all of a sudden, we heard this really loud crack and saw this flash of light through the closed curtains… I jumped up out of bed and took a look outside. Yep, it was a firework that blew up above our apartment and landed on the roof top. I quickly threw some clothes on and made my way outside. There in the alley way, 3 drunk teenagers were playing with fireworks, leaning them against the wall of the hardware store, wishing and hoping they’d get to fly straight up I guess. They were standing less than 40 feet from the propane gas tanks.

DR came behind me to investigate and quickly got on the phone with the police while I had visions of getting a 4 x 4 and knocking some sense into the assholes of our future. As I went back inside to cool off, he witnessed one of the firework falling on the ground after it was lit and fly directly into the front door of a dry cleaner business across the way. A drunkish neighbour thought it was the funniest thing she ever saw. She must be living in a cement house.

The police never came that we know of, but the fireworks did finally run out.

All through the rest of the evening, we could hear cracks and booms around the neighbourhood, and couldn’t really fall back to sleep for a long time.

This morning when I got up, the first news items was about a bus driver in the north end of the city who stopped at a regular stop to pick up a passenger who in turn only light up a firework and threw it at the driver.

So fun.

I am writing a letter to our city councilor to ban fireworks in our part of town, the city already pays of an enormous display in the beaches area, maybe she can spring for a couple of buses to take her idiotic constituents to that location.

A Holiday Monday In The Park With DR

The weather was so perfect today, we had to go for a long walk. We made our way to High Park and took our cameras. You’ll have to click on the pictures for full effect:

Ok, so there’s an emu in a chain-link fence, a big round bush, a dog playing catch in the water, some things to blow on (some blown already… I managed to snap the picture before this horrible kid went and destroyed the vista), a gracious lady who agreed to let me photograph her while exercising, me and an orange creamcicle = 10 minutes of yum, a bison sniffing its baby’s butt, the things that brings us the smell of Christmas in the middle of Summer, a swan who was feeding and taking dump in the same body of water, a cut tree, an homage to my sister’s new card business, a goat washed out by the light, an over-exposed DR with a popsicle (my own homage to the instamatic cameras of the 70s, some trash on the grass, some display of Hindu icons and a lonely man crossing Queen St West with the CN tower in the background.

I have spared you the shots of us pigging out in a bakery, but I’ll tell you that it was mucho-extraordinaro.

Creepy Shadows

On Friday morning after buying my coffee, I sat by a window, sun at my back, as I had about 45 minutes with my book before going into work. A few minutes later, this man came and sat at the table next to me and started eating his breakfast… I had noticed someone coming my way, but didn’t take a look to see what the person looked like… but from the corner of my eyes, the shadows started to play like in a very creepy film.

This is what it looked like from my point of view: (if you scroll down quickly, you can see him eat)

When I got up to leave, I had to take a look at who would give such a distrubing shadow. It was a young professional in his late 20′s / early 30′s, middle eastern descent, slicked back hair. Not ugly at all… Funny what impressions our shadow give people.

Villains?? They Are Finally Showcased!

On their cruise ships only at this time, but still, it’s a step forward… maybe one day we’ll have Villains Land or a Villains hotel at Walt Disney Wolrd:

Pushing The Button

On our walk home last night, a semi-drunk young middle-eastern man in capri pants and tight t-shirt with long unruly frizzy hair and aviator sunglasses holding his tresses back, a hipster-wannabe, probably new to the city, stopped up at a street corner. He kept pushing the button used to alert drivers that a pedestrian wants to cross the street, and as he kept doing so, he asked us if that was the button to call for a streetcar…

We showed him to the streetcar stop sign which was a few steps further and he walked right next to it, touching it with his shoulder, wanting to be the first in line I guess.

After walking away from the location, DR and I started blurting out the answers that popped up in our minds right after he asked:

“No, this is to call the cops”
“No, this is to alert of terrorists in the area”
“No, this is for drinks service”
“No, this is to alert the fashion police”
“No, this is the button you push when you’re part of a very annoying trend”

What’s Walt’s Line?

In 1956, Walt went on a game show… and then see the birth of the Jerry Lewis Telethon…

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