Recently I spent an entire day at the St-Lawrence Centre in a class called: “Dealing With Difficult Customers and Complaints”. I had signed up for it a long time ago as I thought it might have some insights as to how to defuse situations at the counter and also maybe some tips on how to keep the energy up from the first customers of the day to the last. Let’s face it I deal with difficult customers and complaints for the larger part of the day.

The room where the class was held contained 8 large tables with 5 chairs around them. I took a seat at the back left corner, two other people joined me in the course of the morning, but the tables closest to the doors where the ones filled up to capacity and some of them taking an extra chair from a neighbouring table so they could sit with people they knew, as if they thought the closest to the door, the faster they can be on the sidewalks at break time or to the subway at the end of the day. The class started at 9am and went until 4pm, the instruction had us arrived a few minutes in advance as the programme was really charged and the class would start promptly at 9am.

Promptly, as promised, the facilitator introduced herself, threw in a few cute/funny anecdotes about her experience, did a quick count around the room and announced that 7 people were missing. She then went around the room and asked us to introduced ourselves with name, what department from the city we were in and what were our expectations for the day. Then the fun started.

One by one, the late arrivals came in while she was in mid-sentence and she’d make sure to ignore them until they had found a seat and then she’d ask the person: “Was it the traffic? Was it the subway? Was it the fact that you just wanted a day off from work and didn’t think that being here on time was that important?” I liked her instantly.

During the day, she went through a lot of theory as to how to defuse difficult situations and I realized that I was already practicing a lot of them in my daily routine, but there was one thing that she preached that I knew for sure would never work for me… Her most important tip was to let someone have their say (read yell) and continue to listen by adding “Is that so?”, “Really?”, “You don’t say”, etc and then when they were out of breath and nearly finished with their issue, you’d just introduced yourself and let them know they had come to the right place to fix the problem… Thing is that might be so if you work in a bank, if you work in a store or something of the sorts where a product or service is in question, but it doesn’t work so much when it involves a speeding ticket or by-law infraction. There is nothing I can do to fix that situation if the person feels they were given the ticket wrongly… All I’m there to do is explain the options they have on how to fight it, I can’t fix it… so introducing myself and telling them that they are at the right place isn’t going to make it anywhere close to better for them. I said so to the facilitator and she put me to task to prove that it applied to everyone, including my line of work. Oh fuck. Roleplay…

She asked one big burly guy to play the unhappy customer who just received a parking ticket and I was to be the guy at the counter. She made us stand up at the front of the class with an audience of 26 onlookers. Great. And Action:

Burly: &$%$^ parking ticket $$#%#$ stupid fuck ^^$&$^$ not paying $#%&@*@^
Me: (putting her theory to use) Hu-huh
Burly: &@#*!%!% never had a ticket %&&@*!% I want him to lose his job $$%%@&!@@&*
Me: Really?
Burly: &@@#*@*@ you better fix it %###*# I’m not paying %@@*@&^@ you’re all lazy &@&&@$@
Me: Is that so
Burly: @*@&&@^@& he had nothing better to do &&@&!*%$@ why was he picking on me
Me: You don’t say

And it went on and on… This was acting 101, not a real situation, based on her theory we could’ve gone on and on like this for another hour, he was roleplaying, he would’ve continued to swear for another long time and I would’ve continued to just listen. It certainly wasn’t real life.

She said I wasn’t trying to do anything I was just listening, so I mentioned that based on what she said I had to wait until he was done. She said I could try and stop him to say that you needed to get more facts and ask questions.

Burly: $@#*@&@% ticket &@%#&@^ waaaaah waaaaaah &@%#$@
Me: Ok, so you say that you got the ticket at this place?
Burly: ^@&#$ yes, can’t you read *#&#^#
Me: I can read but I want to hear your side of the story (which in reality I couldn’t give a flying fuck about, but I’m roleplaying to the theory I just learned)
Burly: &@^$(@* fix it &#^$*#
Me: I can’t fix this, your opti…
Burly: *#&^$*# fix it you stupid *#*#&$^
Me: Let’s just look at your options (it’s becoming annoying and embarrassing now, I’m feeling my ears getting hotter which means my face is getting red. I’m not an actor, I’m not here to perform)
Burly: @%@&^ FIIIIIX IIIIIT!!!!
Me: (turning to the facilitator) Huh… this isn’t real life!
Facilitator: He’s doing this because you’re letting him do it, you’re not intervening the right way
Me: A-what?
Facilitator: You haven’t introduced yourself, you haven’t taken control of the situation, he’s still in charge…
Me: It could be but I don’t work in a bank where customer service is a must, I’m at a counter where we have to go through 800 customers in one day with only 4 people working at a time, we don’t have time to listen to their stories, they either fight the ticket or pay the ticket… and the fight happens in court with a Justice of the Peace not us.
Facilitator: Ok, you’re getting anxious, you’re letting the customer walk over you… Let’s do something to calm you down, to center you.

And with that, she literally joined me at the front of the room, made me stand straight, opened my hands to the side of my body, lifted my chin and told me to take 3 big breaths in and out… WWHHAAATTTT???? I took the first one and then felt totally embarrassed that I was in front of 25 other people doing this. I looked at her and said:

Me: this is really not what would happen in my situation, it never gets to this level because we never let it get there. My idea for this course was not to act in front of a class, it was to find out how I can start with energy at 8am and finish with the same energy at 4pm after having seen 200 people complaining. Maybe I signed up for the wrong class
Facilitor: Ok, what would you do in that situation?
Me: (looking at Burly) Sir, you can scream all you want but until you start talking to me at the same level I’m talking to you, you will be speaking to an empty counter because they don’t pay to babysit, they pay me to take your money or your request to go to court.
Facilitator: And that works
Me: Everytime. And if they complain, my lead and supervisor after that will tell them the same thing. It’s a right to demand a court date if you feel you’ve received a ticket unjustly but it’s not your right to act like a jerk. Plus if they don’t calm down, there’s a couple of manly security guard who will come and remind them to act in a civilized manner. We don’t have time to shake someone’s hand and tell them there in good hands now…
Facilitator: Ok, let’s try someone else now…

It’s weird, I really liked her up until that embarrassing “roleplay” moment but I left knowing that I really hadn’t learn anything and that I hate performing and ad-libing in front of a full room. And I said so in my review too. Hopefully it might work in someone else’s favour in the future.

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